Thinking of self....less.

A couple of months ago I happened upon Billy Graham's website, and wouldn't you know the daily devotional was about dealing with anxiety.  He talked about how having our minds on ourselves and not on Christ and others can be destructive.  The scripture for that day was Isaiah 26:3, "He will keep in perfect peace all those who trust in Him, whose thoughts turn often to the Lord."  The prayer for that day was, "Keep my mind on You Lord, and help me to discipline the thoughts of self which crowd out Your peace."  This made a lot of sense to me, and over the weeks God has showed me how my anxiety has stemmed partly from my self centered thoughts.  I can recall several occasions over the years when I was feeling anxious or actually having a panic attack, but when something distracted me, the feelings/attack went away.  My anxiety happens generally when I have nothing else to do but think of my "self" and my feelings.  Romans 8:6 says, "For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace."   I've always prided myself on not being one of those women who has something on the calendar everyday and is so busy and stressed out.  Our family has lots of leisure time and we like it that way.  But maybe I need to find a balance between leisure time and activities to keep my mind off of self, especially activities that involve serving others.  God has been putting it on my mind a lot lately that I need to be more of a servant.  Growing up I never had a good example of what it meant to serve others, so it has been really hard for me now as an adult to see those opportunities.  But Jesus came to serve and He wants me to serve others as well.  I feel God is telling me that serving others is one way to keep my mind off of self and in turn, my anxiety will become less and less.  Philippians 2:3-4, "...in humility count others more important than yourselves.  Let each of you look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."  If you are going through the same thing, may your prayer be that God would turn your thoughts toward Christ and your actions toward serving others.

Philippians 4:8, "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things."

They Don't Write Bills Like They Used To!

I'm really into politics.  As a Christian, I think it's our duty to recognize evil and at least attempt to do something about it.  Recently, I've been listening to the lectures on the Constitution offered on-line for free from Hillsdale College.  I recommend them for anyone who loves this nation-a gift from God, and wants to preserve it's heritage.  There are arguments on both sides as to whether America is a christian nation or not.  But after going through this study, there is no doubt that the Constitution was divinely written.  It's so awesome to me that a relatively small document (a few thousand words compared to the several thousand page monstrosoties we have nowadays), could be so clear that any man could understand it, and so well written that it became the foundation of such a great nation.   How can that be anything other than a work of God?  In the Federalist Papers #62, Hamilton/Madison talks about the dangers of ever changing bills and laws:   "It poisons the blessing of liberty itself. It will be of little avail to the people, that the laws are made by men of their own choice, if the laws be so voluminous that they cannot be read, or so incoherent that they cannot be understood; if they be repealed or revised before they are promulgated, or undergo such incessant changes that no man, who knows what the law is to-day, can guess what it will be to-morrow. Law is defined to be a rule of action; but how can that be a rule, which is little known, and less fixed?"  Hello!!  That has present-day America written all over it!  Here is another good quote from The Federalist Papers #51: "But what is government itself, but the greatest of all reflections on human nature? If men were angels, no government would be necessary. If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary. In framing a government which is to be administered by men over men, the great difficulty lies in this: you must first enable the government to control the governed; and in the next place oblige it to control itself." 

Just Do It.

I feel like it’s time to share something that I’ve only shared with a few, choice people. I’m one of the millions of Americans who suffer from anxiety. It all started about 8 years ago. I was sitting at my desk at work, and all of a sudden my heart started beating rapidly, I started sweating and I felt a terror come over me. I thought I was going to die, it was terrifying! I had no idea what was going on so I had a co-worker drive me home. I felt better shortly after that. It happened again several days later only this time I felt like my throat was closing up and again, someone had to drive me home because I was so terrified something would happen if I drove myself. Over the following weeks and months, I went to the doctor several times and I had no answers--nothing was wrong with me. One night I just knew my throat was closing up so I had Trent take me to the emergency room. They found nothing wrong and suggested that it was anxiety related. I brushed that off because I’m not one of those “crazy” people. But over time and many hours spent on WebMD…I accepted that it was indeed anxiety related. But why? My life was great. I was the happiest I’d ever been in my whole life when this had all started, it just didn’t make sense and I was so frustrated. I knew I didn’t want to get on medication because I don’t feel that is the answer. Medication does not deal with psychological and spiritual issues. I got therapy for awhile and it was helpful but expensive. Several years have gone by now, and I’m still dealing with these issues. But I want people to know that through it all God has been my strength and my song, and He will continue to be until He see’s fit to release me of this burden. This is really hard to talk about, and I find it interesting that even though so many of us suffer, we don’t want to talk about it and continue to suffer in silence. Probably because we’ve had it ingrained in our heads that people with mental problems are “crazy.” But most of us aren’t crazy, we’re just in bondage from Satan and his lies, but we don’t have to be because Jesus has set us free! I know there are others out there and I just want to offer my prayers and support. Let’s carry each other’s burdens! Galatians 6:2 “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

"I will give you a wise and discerning heart."

Lately I've been thinking a lot about bible studies.  This might not be popular, but here it goes...  I think the  American Church relies too much on bible studies.  What brought this into my thinking was my own ability (or lack thereof), to read the bible on my own with a purpose and glean wisdom from it.  Hebrews 5: 12 says, "In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again.  You need milk, not solid food!  Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness.  But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil."  Sure, bible studies have their place.  I was immensely helped by a Beth Moore study years ago in my early years of being a Christian.  But I was a new Christian, and that study was for a very specific issue.  Bible studies seem like "teacher's editions" where the work has already been done, the answers are there for you, we don't have to do any work on our own.  I could be wrong, but when I think of people like Billy Graham, Del Tackett, or Francis Chan, I don't picture them doing bible studies.  They're the ones writing the studies for the immature Christians who can't study the bible on their own.  I want to go deeper in my relationship with the Lord, and I think to do so I need to stop relying on the wisdom/work of others and start relying/praying for knowledge from the Holy Spirit.  "For the Lord gives wisdom, and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding."  Proverbs 2: 6. Instead of jumping on the latest, greatest bible study band-wagon, I wish the church would encourage and train members to ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom and discernment for themselves--to want "solid food."  The Lord will/wants to give it to us!   I would love to know others opinions on this if you want to leave a comment!

Whole Wheat Waffles

This is a good, healthy recipe for someone who doesn't have a lot of time to eat in the morning and it's also a good breakfast for babies and toddlers, which is what I make them for.  The boys can feed it to themselves so that's helpful to me.  : )  Every couple of weeks I make 2 batches full, freeze them and warm them up in the toaster when ready to eat. 

Whisk together 1 1/2 c of whole wheat flour, 2 tsp. baking powder, 1/2 tsp. salt, 2 Tbls. sugar.  In another bowl whisk together 1 egg, 1 1/2 c. lukewarm milk, 1/3 c. melted butter, 1 tsp. vanilla extract.  Then whisk the wet and dry ingredients together.  Add any fruit that you like if you want.  I added blueberries the last time I made them and they turned out great.  Note: batter will be running but that's okay.  Cook in the waffle iron for about 6 minutes.  I serve them to the boys just plain; no butter or syrup and they enjoy them that way, but I'm sure most people would want to add those items.  Give them a try!

Watch out, Olive Garden!!

This is my version of Olive Garden's soup Zupa Toscana.  I had some white beans and ditalini instead of potatoes so I used those instead.  This soup is very easy to make and extremely tasty!

First cook up one pound of italian sausage.  Then saute half an onion and two cloves of minced garlic in some olive oil in a big pot.  After the onions have sweated out I added 10 cups of water and 5 chicken bouillion cubes and brought it to a boil.  I then added 4 or 5 handfuls of ditalini which is a short cut pasta(elbow macaroni would probably work too) and cooked it for 10 minutes. Then I added 2 cans of white beans, the sausage, one bundle of kale torn to bite-sized pieces,  and one cup of heavy whipping cream.  Let it sit for about 10 minutes and salt and pepper to taste.  Enjoy!

My Cup Overflows

I came from a broken, dysfunctional family.  Statistically I should be an unwed mother on welfare.  But God in His love and mercy, called me out of darkness and into His wonderful light.  My testimony isn't anything flashy, but it's mine.  I had two best friends in middle school who loved me and prayed for me.  I asked Jesus into my heart at 14 and was baptized months later.  From then until now is a long story, but mainly I want to talk about how God has made my life abundant even though I don't deserve it, and this abundant life is for everyone.  I think most girls, as they're growing up, have a picture in their head of what their life will be like in the future; what kind of husband they want, how many children they'll have and what kind of home you'll live in.  I'm sure I did, though I don't remember giving it much thought.  I don't suppose I had much hope seeing the kinds of things I'd seen.  But as time goes on, I'm seeing more and more how God has blessed my obedience to Him with "a good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over."  I have the best husband in the world for me.  He is also a great dad, provider, and treats me how I've always wanted to be treated.  God not only gave me the desire of my heart concerning the characteristics of my husband, He exceded it!  When I was a teenager, twin boys were something I wanted one day when I got married.  And while I didn't have twins, I have two sons that are 13 months apart, so it's close enough!  Again, God gave me the desire of my heart, and then exceded it.  What a great God we have!  Trust in Him and be obedient to His word and He will give you the desires of your heart and then some!